28 January 2008

Conned [the road to hell]

I refer to the ConMan in the post below. Trusting my instincts would have been smart; instead, I put my faith in opportunity and sex.

He told me he wanted to make me pregnant three weeks after the first kiss so that he could "become a part of me." One week later, a confession: "I'm in love with you." What girl raised on late 80s/early 90s romantic comedies is built to resist? Not I. However, relaxing into love, I let myself step off the pedestal. Apparently, the ConMan doesn't like seeing eye to eye.

Must I say this again? Hindsight is 20/20.
O, you liar! You slut!
You rank piece of filth disguised in poet's words.
Your self-ignorance astounds!

He tricked me because he tricked himself - his honest desire to give love matched solely by his inability. The ConMan is a collector of ex-girlfriends. Beautiful women kept on hand [not too close, those], gathering an idea here, a trait here, till he has mind-built the perfect girlfriend. What you stupid Myspace profile says is right:

Who I'd like to meet:
Someone I never will.

Dear Readers,

Perhaps I am back. Perhaps not. Can you believe the word of a heartbroken stoner? You ought not to, though my intentions, like the ConMan's, are good.

Ah, I can see it - the road to hell.


vinhil2000 said...

good to see you back. Love is a difficult thing. Don't hold back, get out there again.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps you are more like the ConMan than you'd like to believe. You pretend as much as he does. You expect others to be an idealized version of themselves, and when you realize that they are human you brush them off and pretend that they never existed. You punish others for your own shortcomings. You supress the people you claim to support.

StonedGrrrl said...

To Anonymous:
Clinton - is that you?
Even if it's not, please. You don't know what you're talking about. I don't like idealism. I like flaws and scars and imperfection.


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